Shout Out

I just wanted to direct you to an article on the Global Kimeeza II (which was what my trip to Uganda was all about) written by one of the Ugandan participants!

Also, not surprising to me, but a reinforcement as to why we need this war in Northern Uganda to end, a new report states that 62% of children living in internally displaced peoples camps are sexually abused. One of the more distressing statistics was: Among the supposed victims, 34 per cent said they were compelled to have sex in exchange for basic needs. Read more here.

Workin' Hardly

I know I've been awfully quiet as of recent. Part of it was that I was in Cancun, which was a nice break from reality. But now I've just been busy as hell preparing for the big move out of my house and for my Europe trip, both of which are taking place in March and April! I officially put in my two weeks at work on Monday (YAY, Wahoooooo, Yipeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!) but of course it's my busiest time for work, right before we release a deliverable to the client and since I'm Quality Assurance, this is my busy time. Of course I don't feel like doing anything anymore for my job, so I'm trying to balance that, get enough done so I don't fall behind but really not push myself to excel either. After all, next Friday I'll be DONE FOR GOOD with this stinkin' job. Can you tell I'm a little bit giddy about that?

So I've been quite swamped as of recent and will be for a while until we're settled in North Carolina, our new location. This is the first big decision I've made with my life and I'm scared to death, but that's why I have to do it! If something scares me then I aim to conquer it. I don't know if it's always the best philosophy since it stresses the hell out of me, but hopefully it works out for me in the end.

I'm excited to pursue what I'm really passionate about (Social Work) and I'm hoping that doing something I care about and enjoy will leave me energized for the rest of my life, unlike now where when I'm not at work I carry that unstimulated drained dull feeling I get from my job with me into the rest of my life. It's amazing to me that I can be so exhausted at the end of the day from work when I barely doing anything, but I think I'm just so exhausted from the lack of any stimulation whatsoever. It gives me an incredibly lazy feeling and makes it difficult for me to feel motivated to do the things I enjoy such as work out, write, read, etc. All I want to do is vege on the couch because I feel partly brain dead from the day, probably due to lack of use.

Even though at this point I'm totally in slack mode for my job a part of me really doesn't feel bad (usually I'm quite the perfectionist and people pleaser) because not only did I specifically tell my boss a month before I was moved from Project Coordination (which I was actually enjoying) into Quality Assurance that the only area of project work that I wasn't interested in and didn't enjoy was, of course, QA. Well a month later our QA guy quit and my boss stuck me in the position because he didn't want to hire anybody new. On top of that, a couple of weeks ago my boss sent me a copy of this personality test I took before being hired (he was supposed to give it to me right away but forgot until now) and it said things such as should not work in a monotonous routine job, thrives off of interacting with others, needs to be challenged, is motivated by new projects, etc. Basically describing everything BUT a QA position which is monotonous, you can go days without having to interact with people and is the same every freaking Spiral (stage of the project). Yeah, and you wonder why I've wanted to shoot myself just about every day at work and am in tears every Sunday night about having to go into work the next day. I think my boss is okay on many levels, but the fact that he put me in a job that was completely unsuited for me and he more than should have known that makes me not give a crap about finishing off strong, I worked my arse off trying to do good at a job I despised with every bone in my body which I never should have been put in, so screw it, I'm going to relax and enjoy my last two weeks here! Do some research for Europe and on Nintendo DS games (hubby just surprised me with a Nintendo DS for Europe, in pink! Isn't he the sweetest ever?) and get all the necessary closing/selling your house stuff done.

Done ranting, sorry.

I hate my job and in less than two weeks I will never have to do it again. Right now, there's nothing sweeter in the world.

What Was She Thinking? [Notes on a Scandal]: A Review

What Was She Thinking? [Notes on a Scandal] by Zoe Heller is a riveting, dark and deeply disturbing novel written in intelligent and elegant prose. The novel is told through the point of view of Barbara Covett, a teacher whose loneliness draws her into an obsession over new school teacher Sheba Hart. Barbara's voice is strong and stirring. She appears to be bluntly honest in her narration, but her character is so layered with years of solitude and twisted obsession that you can't help to wonder what she still remains to keep to herself. Through out the novel, Barbara chronicles the love affair of her fellow teacher, Sheba, and a fifth year student, Steven Connolly. Barbara states "This is not a story about me" - but of course it is about her. It's about her addictive need to be needed by Sheba and her obsession with Sheba's life, even in the disturbing details of Sheba's affair with a student at the school they teach at together. It is with sophistication that Barbara tells Sheba's, and her own, story. And with this sophistication you cannot help but to sympathize with not only the bitter spinster, but the child molester as well.

In reminiscence of Lolita, we once again get into the mind of a child molester, but only this time as told by a friend of the pedophile. Taken straight from the headlines, Heller delves into the deeper mind of women molesters. As someone who strongly advocates for women and children rights, it is extremely hard for me to sympathize with pedophiles, but Heller did what Nabokov failed to do for me in Lolita. I grew to like and care for Sheba. I even sympathized with her for a long time before realizing by the end of the book she was just plain crazy and totally self absorbed. In Lolita I never once sympathized with Humbert Humbert. While I was in awe of the writing, perhaps the best written book I've ever read, by the end of the novel I was in such disgust with Humbert that the only thing that got me to finish reading the novel was to find out what happened to Dolores. I pretty much disliked Humbert from the beginning and the dislike grew quite comfortably into a despise. And it's not just that it was obvious how much he was damaging Dolores, because I think by the end of Notes we can see that despite Barbara's defensive claims that "the boy" was not traumatized by any of the events that Steven began to show signs of the strain of the relationship, and since we got a very third person view of him, I'm sure it was even worse than we were shown.

What Was She Thinking? [Notes on a Scandal] is a complex and highly suspenseful novel. I finished it in two days (record time for me with my busy life) and was thinking about it when I wasn't reading it and long after I was finished reading it. I even had trouble getting into the book I started reading after finishing Notes and felt almost dogged down by the drastically different style of writing between Notes and Richard Ford's The Sportswriter. Gone was the intensity and vivid scenes of Notes and here I was reading a leisurely paced book with tons of back story, sporadic scenes and theoretical rants about life by the narrator. The intensity and the characters of Notes are addicting and I fed off of Barbara's obsessiveness to the degree that I was solidly obsessed with the book for a couple of days. I'm still raving about its power and eloquence to anyone who even looks like they could read a book for fun. And fun this novel is, from the emotional roller coaster ride to the deep complexity of the characters, I was hooked from the beginning and am still hooked days after finishing the last haunting page. It is an end without an end, an end that leaves you imagining what will happen to the characters afterwards (do you ever imagine your own ending when novels leave the endings ambiguous?) But it is an end that in it's own way is satisfying and perfect. It is the only ending that Barbara would have ever told.

I'll be trying to see the movie version this weekend. So far it's only in our specialty "artsy" theaters, so I'll be trying to manage over to downtown Cincy for a show. I'm really excited to see the movie, I think this book lays the script for an excellent movie. And since I'd seen the commercials for the movie before I read the book, I could only imagine Sheba and Barbara as Cate Blanchett and Judi Dench, which actually really annoys me. I like to imagine the characters myself before having them fully formed in a movie, but oh well. There was no avoiding that.

Oh, and I wanted to mention real quick, I'd read in other reviews of Notes the long and tedious name of the novel and at first I was inclined to agree. However, after reading the novel I couldn't think of a title that would fit Barbara's academic snobbery better and after all, it is her writing the book, isn't it?

5*

Feeling Ill

I had started a post on my second day in Uganda (I know, it's going to take forever to get through all 15 days of the trip!) but I'm actually feeling very ill. My hubby just got diagnosed with a sinus infection and now I'm exhibiting many of the symptoms he started out with... yeah, so not looking good. The worst of it is that we're leaving for Cancun, Mexico on Wednesday. Nothing more fun than being on vacation sick! Let's hope I can get over it. I need to rest right now, I can barely see the screen and everything in my head aches.

The Cleaner: A Review

The Cleaner by Brett Battles is an international espionage thriller that will be released on June 26, 2007. At first I was a little nervous reading a book by my friend, Brett. What if I didn't like it? And if anyone knows me they know I'm not a good liar, quite the contrary I'm very blunt and possibly more honest than people would like.

Getting into the book was a little slow for me. Part of that I know is because I don't read many espionage/thriller books and so I got really wrapped up in being suspicious of everybody (trying to figure out the mystery before it was really set up, rookie mistake I'm sure!) and getting the hang of the different genre. Also, since it took a little bit for the stakes to be raised it was difficult for me to see where the plot was going. However, Brett picked up the pace real quick as we delved into my favorite part of the novel... the International settings!

Brett takes the readers from the US to Vietnam and then finally to Germany. Brett writes about these locations with authority, given enough detail to make the reader fell like they are literally there. One of my favorite scenes that still sticks with me is when the hero, Quinn, and his apprentice, Nate, walk out of the airport and Nate is literally accosted by a boy trying to carry his luggage for him (for a small fee of course). The details of Vietnam and Germany are very naturally and convincingly written and for a person who has been to neither I felt rather intimate and knowledgeable about both places by the end of the book.

The other aspect of the book that picks up in Vietnam is the relationship part of the book, not necessarily just the romantic relationships, but Quinn's relationship with his apprentice, his past relationships are reminisced about and brought up in various ways and you get a more fuller picture of Quinn. Once the novel gets taken to Germany though is when the real mystery/thriller part of the book explodes. Germany was a full ride of suspense and action and I can say honestly that I flew through the last part of the book, dying to know what was going on, thinking I had it all figured out, only to find out that I had no idea. So let me just clear it up for you all, the Mastermind behind the whole thing is... Ha! Did you really think I'd make it that easy for you?

I'm not really sure what I should or should not say about the plot since information is revealed to you bit by bit, and I don't want to accidentally ruin that for anybody, except that at the beginning of the novel I was baffled by all the seemingly random clues and pieces of information that didn't seem to fit together and then by the end it all impossibly and yet perfectly and yet not at all implausibly fit together!

And possibly the best show of restraint and honesty an author can show, Brett ended the book in a realistic and yet satisfying manner in which not everything was tied up with a red bow with smiley faces all over it, and yet it was realistic and what you'd figure would happen in real life, but also it was a good ending.

The Cleaner is a satisfying, education and fun read. I am happy to say that I enjoyed it thoroughly and am looking forward to reading more of Jonathan Quinn's adventures. And before I forget, let me just mention that it's so cool that the main character is not the cop, the detective or anything else so glamorous, but the guy who cleans up the dead bodies. What a creative idea! Though at first when I read the title I thought the main character was some janitor by day, detective by night guy and I thought that that would be really cool, but that's just because I really like janitors.

I definitely recommend this book when it is released, hell, you can pre-order it now if you want!

4*

I apologize for the delay in getting this review out, I usually like to get the reviews out within days of finishing the book so that it's still fresh in my mind, but due to my computer difficulties I was unable to. Just to keep you updated, I'm still not sure if I can get the data off of my fried laptop, but Hubby and I decided to buy a new desktop either way since my laptop was slow as heck with all the stuff we had on it and obviously not very reliable since it liked to overheat, so we'd been planning on buying a desktop for a while. Yes, we went to the dark side, much to the detriment of my brother and some of my friends! We got an iMac. I've heard nothing but good things about Macs through my research (virus free for 7 years now, runs multiple applications flawlessly) and it's definitely been an adventure for me to learn the new operating system, although the rumor is that Vista, Microsoft's new operating system, is modeled after the Mac's operating system so if I were to buy a new PC I'd probably have to learn a new operating system anyways. Well, yeah, so I'll stop justifying my crossover to the dark side for now and I'll let you know how it goes... so far I can honestly say I like it. It runs more smoothly than any PC I've ever had and seems actually simpler to navigate around.

Deadly Prison Sentence

Why does China have to be so creepy? Why?!?!

Technically Inept

I've never been known as someone who's good with technology, especially coming from a family of computer programmers, I'm used to being seen as a little bit as a dummy when it comes to technology. Well, these past couple of weeks have reenforced this view of me to myself and my friends and family.

It first started with the fact that when I got my lost luggage back from British Airlines and found everything suspiciously soaked (though I found nothing broken in the luggage and also found out my trip companions also found their luggage in a similar condition). My cell phone charger was soaked, but my phone was dead so I decided to shake it around a little bit then plug it into my phone. It not only did not work but I think it damaged my battery since after that incident my phone has just turned of randomly (when the battery's not even close to done) and then is all scrambled when I try to turn it back on.

Then I lose my second blue tooth... okay, that has nothing to do with my technology ineptness, but it just sucks. Luckily I was able to find this one (the first one I lost is gone forever), especially since this blue tooth is really my hubby's, who insisted that I take it so I wouldn't kill myself when I talk on the phone in the car. (Yeah, he's sweet, isn't he?)

Then I fry my laptop, possibly damaging the hard drive, which means losing everything on the computer... I had most of my stories backed up, but not all, and all my pictures and music is on the laptop... I mean ALL of my pictures from last year which I hadn't backed up yet. My laptop will be examined by a computer doctor today and I'm just praying that we can retrieve the data. I really don't care if the laptop is trashed, I just want my data. :( Grrrr, how I wish I weren't so technically inept.

So, say I do need to buy a new laptop, any suggestions? I was really unhappy with the Dell laptop that I have now because it would overheat too easily (hence it's current fried condition) and I've heard that this is a common problem in Dells. I'm thinking of switching over to the dark side of Macs, but I'm a little scared, not going to lie...

Sorry for the lack of posts as of recent, since I had no computer at home I was unable to continue my Uganda posts nor post my review for Brett Battles' The Cleaner, both of which I'll get to very soon, I promise!

I also wanted to mention that I'm getting completely out of hand with my book obsession. It has finally happened that I've forgotten which books I own and I added a book to my Amazon wish list that I already have! Luckily I happened to see it in my bookcase and deleted it from my wish list before I bought it, but I thought it was a note worthy moment in my book obsession.

Football Translated

"When you don't understand the rules, it just looks like big men running around wrestling," says China-born Kevin Mo...

And so came the great idea for the American Football Encyclopedia:

• Blitz = Lightning war against the QB

• Hail Mary Pass = Miracle long pass

• Onside kick = Gambling kickoff

• Play action = Pass after fake run

• Pocket = Protection arc

• Punt = Give it up and kick it back

• Sack = Capture the commander in chief

• Touchdown = Step on the enemy's territory

Glad we're making such an effort to market American Football in China. But, for safety's sake, I thought I'd post these up on my blog for some of those unfortunate Americans who don't know much about football...

You know who you are.

Also:

We think Sunday's game would be more fun to watch if Phil Simms kept yelling "It's a lightning war against the QB!"

- Deadspin

Couldn't agree more. We can only hope Simms has accessed and read the American Football Encyclopedia or better yet, my blog.

Oh, and while we're sort of speaking about Chinese spam mail, anybody else get Chinese spam?? I mean, spam in Chinese characters? I really don't know how they got my email address, but my spam box is flooded with it. Scary thing is that I can actually read some of it, and I might have purchased some Chinese special herbs that have yet to come in the mail.

Damn Chinese spam!

The NFL Has Way Too Much Time On Its Hands

Really, I couldn't put it much better than they did, so I'm not even gonna try. I know, I'm a lazy bastard today.

How Can You Help If You Don't LOOK?

One of my biggest pet peeves is when proclaimed animal lovers refuse to watch Animal Planet's Animal Precinct or when people who adore children don't want to talk about child sexual abuse. I say bullshit. If you care so much about animals and/or children then you need to actually SEE the abuse that they are forced to endure in order to help them at all. You can't truly help someone unless you understand what is happening to them. I will force myself to see things that make me want to puke, but it's because I want to help and I know that no matter how hard it is for me to see what they've gone through, I'm not going through it so I'd be quite the shallow bitch to complain or say I can't handle it. It's been with this attitude that I've gotten through some Rape Crisis calls with a woman covered in blood, or with a mentally retarded child. I've always made a promise to myself and to the women and the children of this world who are in pain that I will never turn away and I will always try to shine a light in the dark places of this world that nobody wants to look at.

It is with this in mind that I was quite distressed when I read this on The Smoking Gun. It's a report talking about how a new Dakota Fanning (who I love) movie Hounddog isn't finding any buyers at the Sundance Film Festival. And why? Because the movie depicts a rape scene of a young girl. You can read the script of the rape here, and it's very clear that it doesn't show any indecent shots of young Fanning, yet people are still balking at the thought of a rape of a young girl being shown. As Smoking Gun says, yes, it is a very disturbing script and it is probably even more disturbing to watch, but the fact also is that it is Reality! Girls are raped more often than our country wants to admit and to shun a movie that accurately depicts this is a travesty and just absolutely disgusting to me. No, it would not be an easy scene to watch, but that's the point. It's supposed to evoke horror and disgust from you, and hopefully then you might be moved enough to do something about it or at the very least be more aware for your own children's safety.

The film industry has disappointed me by their cowardness.

Speaking of ignoring the abuse of women and children, more abuses by the Janjawid.

The Right To Play

I wanted to provide some links to the blog of my amazing partner who is working with me on the Breakdance Uganda Project that I've already talked so much about to you all. Katie is still in Uganda working on multiple projects and as one of her projects she's been working with Abramz to get his Breakdance Uganda Project ready to receive our funds which I'm sure you'll all be donating to once we get everything set up for it, right?

Please check out a post Katie has written about watching Abramz's Breakdance classes, which I was unfortunately never able to attend. I truly am devastated that I wasn't able to see one.

Also, make sure to read this very moving post about spending a night in a Night Commuter Center, which I was able to visit while I was in Gulu, but didn't spend the night in. When I went the peace talks were still in progress and so there were fewer kids there then there are now. Since the peace talks are stalled the number of children night commuting has risen once again.

Katie truly is an inspiration and on the trip she was our Mama Katie! She has reminded me through her thoughtful and intelligent posts that, as some of the children told her, "As a child, it is my right to play." And it is, and we should never ever forget that.

You Know I'm Game

So I found this on one of my regular sports blogs that I check out, Deadspin, and why am I Not surprised that these nice and talented folks are Steelers Fans??

Go Steelers Nation!

Yeah, I'm soo game!

I've Been Wondering This

What Kind of Reader Are You? Your Result: Dedicated Reader You are always trying to find the time to get back to your book. You are convinced that the world would be a much better place if only everyone read more.
Obsessive-Compulsive Bookworm
Literate Good Citizen
Book Snob
Non-Reader
Fad Reader
What Kind of Reader Are You? Create Your Own Quiz

Sharing An Obsession

I've just realized that for some reason I've completely neglected in sharing one of my biggest obsessions with my blogging community as of yet. Most people who have known me for a while, know of this obsession that has been going on for at least ten years strong (if not longer) and have heard of my trips to as far as St. Louis in order to see this obsession in person. I've been an avid fan of Our Lady Peace for at least half of my life now since the release of their sophomore album, Clumsy. I was watching some YouTubes of Raine Maida's (the lead singer) solo project and thought I'd share a slew of OLP vid clips and music videos with you all so you can share in the obsession if you so choose. I've seen OLP live at least 11 times now (if I were at home I could check my OLP scrapbook to verify that number... and oh yes, I do have an OLP scrapbook) and can say without a doubt as an avid concert goer that they are the BEST band I've ever seen live, even better than the band Live, and they put on a pretty awesome show as well.

Enjoy.

A classic OLP song from their album Clumsy.

Raine Maida's solo project, a more beat poetry type music then OLP's rock sound.

An interview with Raine and his wife Chantal for a glimpse into the rockin' couple's life. I'm not usually the type of person to follow the celebrities because frankly I don't care and our country's obsession with celebrities makes me ill, but I truly admire Raine Maida as a person from his music (he writes all of OLP's lyrics) and his activism with War Child Canada and so cannot resist being curious about his personal life. But please don't think I give a damn what he or his wife are wearing.

Thank you for allowing me to share my obsession. There's nothing obsessives like to do more then to try to infect others with their obsessions.

Eat It ESPN!

I can't help but to crack up at Cracked's spoof on ESPN's website. If you've ever visited the ESPN site, please check this out and enjoy that warm sensation in your pants that is your pee.

Darfur and Technology

I wanted to point your attention to the deteriorating conditions in Darfur, Sudan. Despite a promised cease-fire, Sudan has been attacking aid workers.

As Newsweek reported, at least four female aid workers have been beaten and sexually abused recently — raped in the case of two French women.

In addition, an aid worker in Sudan tells me that on Jan. 22 the police raided a party in the city of Nyala and arrested 22 employees of aid groups. Several were beaten and one woman was sexually abused but managed to fend off an attempted rape.

Broader security is also collapsing. On a road near Bulbul that used to be safe, gunmen stopped a public bus in the middle of the day and brutally beat the men and gang-raped the women for hours. In the face of all this, aid workers are jittery and some are pulling out.

Yet Europe is oblivious (the Davos conference here has great sessions on Africa but nothing on Darfur). President Bush has been better than most world leaders, but still pathetic: he mustered half a sentence in his State of the Union address. Perhaps this is because Mr. Bush regards the situation as tragic but hopeless, but in fact there is plenty he could do.

He could speak out forcefully about Darfur. He could bring victims to the White House for a photo op. He could help the U.N. send a force to protect Chad and the Central African Republic — while continuing to push for U.N. peacekeepers in Darfur itself. He could visit Darfur or Chad and invite European or Chinese officials to join him. He could invite African leaders to Washington for a summit meeting that would include discussion of Darfur. He could impose a no-fly zone. He could develop targeted sanctions against Sudanese leaders. He could begin forensic accounting to find assets of those leaders in Western countries. He could call on NATO and the Pentagon to prepare contingency plans in case the janjaweed start massacring the hundreds of thousands of Darfuris in camps.

And this weekend he could telephone a few African presidents to tell them what a catastrophe it would be if Africa chose Mr. Bashir as its leader.

- Nick Kristof (at Coalition for Darfur)

Thanks to Mick Hartley for keeping up on the situation. Read more on Mick's blog here and here.

On another note, here is a really great post on using technology with development projects.

Consider technologies like Wimax, an easy to deploy broadband wireless technology, that can cover large geographical areas – up to 50km – at fast speeds, up to 72mps. Wimax is perfect for peri-urban and more rural areas. It could help Government bring new services to the recovering North and facilitate trade. In June 2006, the roll-out of Uganda’s Wimax network began. Can Government, the donors and the private sector help finish the job and make a wired Northern Uganda a reality?

Think about new low-cost solutions like Motorola’s Motofone, a no frills cellphone designed just for the rural market. The unit is dust-proof, uses voice prompts to local languages, has extended battery life, and is affordable. Especially given the difficulty of travel and land-line communication, opening up a strong cell market in places like Northern Uganda would seem to make sense, lowering the costs of doing business, and helping provide security and reliability to potential investors. Can Uganda jump start this market?

Or, how about the highly anticipated $100 laptop that is already proposed for Emerging Markets like Brazil, Nigeria and Rwanda? Current plans call for the distribution up to 15 million of the devices in 2007, which feature full-color, a 500MHz processor, and wireless broadband capabilities. Will Government and the aid agencies help bring the tools of the wired world to Gulu?

- Andy's Global View

Thanks to Jack Fruity for bringing me to this really innovative and creative article about working in development in countries that currently have little access to technology.

Update: Please check out this great post on an extremely innovative solution to a large problem that have been plaguing Sudanese refugees. Thank you Elizabeth!

A Reminder And A Shout Out

I had mentioned way long ago that there was a group Flickr account for the Uganda trip, but I thought I'd re-mention it. I'll have to link it on my blog somewhere, I was thinking of making another badge, but that might just be too much so I might just throw another link there for the group account. The pictures on the group account will probably give you a better picture of the actual work/stuff we did there for the conference, such as pictures from the IDP camps and our speakers, etc. My pictures tended to be more social since for many of our trips only one person was allowed to take pictures. But please check it out, it gives a much more in depth view of our trip!

Also had to give a shout out to my dear friend Colin who helped lead the trip from Uganda. He's a unique person, to say the least. He's extraordinarily kind and ridiculously funny with a train of thought that is hard to follow sometimes. Really, I don't need to say anything else about him because you can get his dynamic personality from his blog so well, that you just need to go on over and check it out! He's a newbie blogger and I'm happy to give him a shout out and send you on over there. I promise, you will not lack for entertainment!

And just to prove that I really did know him before he became rich and famous from his blog, here is proof in form of a picture:

Uganda, Day 1: Arrival Into The Country

It was with no expectations and an unusual calm that I landed in Uganda. After an exhausting day of travel, I couldn't even wrap my brain around any thoughts of what Uganda was going to be like. I wasn't naive enough to buy into all the Africa stereotypes of wild animals running around all over the place, as if just being in Africa was a wild safari ride nor any of the other common stereotypes that people often have of Africa. Many people I know in the States were surprised that there were colleges in Uganda as if every country in Africa was still 100 years behind the world. One topic that quickly got brought up within our group was what people at home thought of Africa. One great example is when I was asked by a co-worker (I'll kindly refine from pointing out any more specifics of this co-worker that would reveal his identity) where I went and I responded that I went to Uganda, his face scrunched up in thought and he asked, without any shame, "Wait, is that like in South America or Africa or something?" Of course I responded politely that it was in Africa, but one of my favorite co-workers didn't stop himself from giving my ignorant co-worker a "are you retarded" look, finally bringing my ignorant co-worker to shame. It seems a common theme for people in America to think of Africa as one big country. Considering that I'm going to Europe soon, I've noticed the difference of telling people you're going to Europe versus going to Africa. When you tell people you're going to Europe, you immediately get the question as to what countries you'll be going to. I truly cannot remember one person asking me what country I was going to when I told people I was going to Africa. Perhaps that's a mixture of people knowing less about Africa then Europe, and also due to the fact that so many people travel to Europe and they want to see if you're going to where they've been, but I still feel that there is the perception prevalent in our country that does not distinguish between the countries in Africa. I can tell you for a fact that nearly everyone I spoke to had no idea where Uganda was in Africa.

Coming into Uganda knowing the perceptions and prejudices that many Westerners have entered African countries with, I was determined to have a completely open mind. With my first step off the plane, I was already in love with the country. Looking across the landscape of Uganda felt like I was breathing in beauty with my eyes. I was in awe of it all and also in awe of the fact that I was there, drinking it all in in person. A dream since high school finally realized. Perhaps I'd expected some life changing moment as soon as I stepped off of the plane, perhaps I expected rays of light to shoot from the sky to reveal some holy revelation to me, but I felt odd feeling so normal in Uganda. I still cared that my hair was flipping out weird with this odd kink where I slept on it on the plane. I was still conscious of making friends in the group and feeling my every fault and oddity like a sharp stone sticking into my side. I was still me even though I was in this different country, I didn't magically transform into something much more inspiring or amazing, all the images I had of myself being adventuress and selfless traveling across the world to give myself to others were evaporated. I was still frumpy little me, yes I wanted to help and give to others, but I also still cared about myself in the ways that normal people do. I still wanted to have fun and to have things for myself, to feel pretty and liked and to be accepted. Perhaps it was finally time to accept that I am not Mother Teresa as much as I wish I could be so selfless, and I as I think of this I think it's humorous to me that many athletes perhaps will idealize people like Michael Jordon and their talent, while I idealize Mother Teresa and her complete selflessness. I truly am a non-profit nerd.

Kampala is as bustling of a city as I've ever seen! I've been to New York, Chicago, San Francisco and those are busy cities, but Kampala is bustling! People are always on the move, and so many people too! Rushing around, cars, matatus, bodas all driving ridiculously close to each other, so close that you could pick each others' noses. Poor children follow you around with their hands outstretched saying "hello" and "sar" to any mzungu ("white person" in Swahili) who walks by and they just about break your heart as they wave at you, but you almost can't even look at them because then they'll follow you around for a couple of streets. Traveling through Kampala is exciting and bewildering all at once, and I know I've complained about the potholes in previous posts, but let me just tell you, the potholes are insane. I cannot believe the conditions of the roads in Uganda and am now more than happy to pay for taxes that go into our road maintenance! The fact that there are potholes the size of small cars that vehicles literally have to drive around is just ridiculous! Oh, and by the way, if you ever travel to Uganda, FYI, they pretty much ONLY take Visa. Yeah, I have no Visa credit cards to my name, only Master Card and American Express. And if you only have $20 dollar bills, they charge you $2-3 for ever $20 dollar bill just to convert it to shillings. Funny thing is that I had $50 and $100 dollar bills (which did not have a conversion fee) but I broke them just for the trip because I thought it wouldn't be a good idea to be carrying around big bills like that. So I had to rely on my fellow Americans who did have Visa cards to get money out for me and trade so I didn't have to pay the conversion fee.

We met the Kampala participants right away on our first day, after dropping our stuff off in our rooms. I'll never forget the nervousness of meeting all of them, worrying whether they'd like me or not, how we would get along, what we'd talk about. I was very conscious of their culture and hoped I didn't unintentionally insult anybody because of my ignorance on some cultural nuance. But immediately as the Ugandans came into the dining hall and introduced themselves to me I felt their warmth and friendship. As I got to know everyone's very differing personalities I also learned some of my favorite nuances about their culture. How people say "sorr-ah" for just about anything bad that may happen to you whether or not it's their fault, it's so sweet, thoughtful and genuine. How whenever someone begins speaking in a big group setting, such as asking a question of one of our speakers, he or she starts with "Thank you very much honorable minister" before even thinking of uttering their question. The endless politeness and thoughtfulness of the people I've met in Uganda is inspiring and warmed my heart immensely and coming back to America, especially to such a cold and uninviting city such as Cincinnati (I will tell you for a fact Minnesota held much friendlier people) has been a harsh harsh jolt to my heart.

My first day in Uganda was an exhausting and busy day that ended up feeling like at least two days rather than one. Near the end when we traveled as a group to the internet and I was able to chat on G-chat with my hubby I had realized that I'd been so busy that I hadn't been able to miss him yet, as funny as that sounds. Chatting with him made me feel that slight sting, but I was able to walk it off and breath in the dusty Uganda air and live in the moment, something I've struggled endlessly to do in America. Despite the very starchy, bland food, the rusty toilets without seats, the rock hard and squeaky beds, somehow I felt at home. I was rather shocked at how quickly I adjusted to the living conditions that I wasn't used to. I was surrounded by people who thought like I did and refused to live in the American suburban bubble and who chose to see the world's pain as their own pain. I was surrounded by a culture built on helping each other and full of warmth and love. I was more home than I'd ever been before because it was the home I'd always dreamed about. And from my very first day in Uganda, I knew it'd always be my second home, next to the one I was born into. The home that I'll always go back to and that has ingrained itself as a seed in my soul that will grow and grow until it is just as much apart of me as the home I was born in.

Very Grave Weddings

I really don't know what to say about this except... WTF?!?!?!?

A ring of gangsters who traded in the bodies of women they murdered, selling them as brides to keep dead bachelors happy in the afterlife, has been arrested in China.

The arrests have exposed a trade that places a higher value on women when they are dead than when they are alive.

Yang Dongyan, 35, was arrested on January 4 in Sha’anxi province as he played cards with his children. In his prison cell, Mr Yang showed little remorse for committing two murders. He told the Legal Daily: “I just wanted to make money. It’s a quick way to make money. I was arrested too soon otherwise I had planned to do this business a few more times.”

The article continues with more creepy professional murdering of brides-to-be stories, but really, that should be enough to creep the hell out of you. I feel like this is straight out of that old TV show that used to scare the shit out of me when I was a youngster, Tales From the Crypt.

Thanks to Mick Hartley for filling my dreams with hellish nightmares for the night.

Bombs For Books!

Bomb worries help book sales: After New Years Eve bomb blasts put Bangkok on edge, "Thailand's book market looks likely to grow by 10% this year, partly thanks to the new-found preference of many to stay at home rather than going out."

Thanks to The Millions for this link... really, I think it's a really positive campaign for books. I mean, whatever gets people reading, right? Right?!?!